Dumbest Superheroes Ever, Ranked

Every classic superhero has a distressing, if not tragic, history that molds who they are as characters, their moral compass, and how they became a hero. Most of these origin stories vary widely, and some of them provide insight into the mind of a comic book character.

Bruce Wayne’s parents are murdered in front of him as a youngster by a gun-wielding assailant. As a result, Bruce grows up to combat crime and has a great aversion to employing weapons or any type of fatal force. Spider-Uncle Man’s Ben was assassinated by a thief he let go, and his concept of justice may be summed up by Ben’s most famous quote:

“With great power comes with great responsibility.”

Then there are other superheroes whose beginnings are unclear, taken directly from other superheroes, or make no sense at all. Most of the authors for these characters were attempting to differentiate them from others but ended up appearing like complete idiots as a result of their attempts. Not every hero’s home planet can be destroyed, and not every hero’s family member can impart knowledge to them. Sometimes their beginnings are simply stupid.

Ranked below are the 5 Dumbest Superheroes Ever.

SQUIRREL GIRL

Squirrel Girl is everyone’s favorite wacky (pun intended) superhero. She’s grown in popularity in recent years as her abilities have become legendary, and she’s even beaten Thanos and Galactus on her own.

Her roots, on the other hand, are quite foolish. She was born with a tail, and physicians decided that she is not a mutant, but rather has an unusual connection with squirrels. It doesn’t get much further than that, which is a true shame because such a popular figure deserves something more in-depth and engaging than this, but alas.

The girl who defeated Doctor Doom’s strength was merely a girl born with a tail and a penchant for squirrels.

FIREBRAND

Danette Reilly was just like any other volcano researcher when she was hit by lightning and plunged into a lava hole while inspecting a volcano. Fortunately for her, the scorching lava did not kill her but instead bestowed upon her supernatural fire powers. How come the lava didn’t kill her? Because, duh, that was “mystical lava!”

Add to it the fact that Firebrand was originally a bigot who despised Japanese people in especially because her brother, the original Firebrand, was killed in the Pearl Harbor assault. Sure, she subsequently made amends and turned over a new leaf, but it’s incredible that this was ever permitted on the pages of a comic book.

DOCTOR DROOM

Doctor Droom, not Doctor Doom, who is a really amazing villain, is a complete moron with an origin that will leave you scratching your head.

Doctor Droom was the first Doctor Strange. Anthony Ludgate Druid was a psychiatrist and explorer, as well as a minor telepath and magician, who specialized largely in hypnosis and other feats of mesmerism. Soon after, he flew to Tibet to improve his talents under The Ancient One. He changed into… an Asian guy after gaining his magical skills.

That’s accurate, Anthony Druid was once a white man who began studying magic, and when he gained magical talents, he became Asian. How in the world does that work? Why hasn’t anybody else turned Asian? Sensible?

KID FLASH (WALLY WEST)

While investigating Barry Allen’s research facility, Wally West was regrettably engaged in a bizarre accident in which lightning struck a number of substances, bestowing upon him the same abilities as the original Flash. He even started wearing like The Flash, but the writers determined it was too difficult to tell the difference, so they changed his costume yellow to avoid any misunderstanding. Thank you very much. Why don’t you simply make up your own character?

Yes, when authors lack originality, they merely replicate the same events that worked in the past. It’s difficult to think these creative minds could be so sloppy with their writing at times. The same event happened again and again. What are the chances? It’s slim to none.

BADGER

Norbert Sykes was a Vietnam War vet with multiple personality disorders. One of the identities that hampered his body was “The Badger,” a figure that could communicate with animals. Sounds innocuous enough, but he adopted this character because he felt he witnessed God appear to him as a badger.

After escaping the mental facility where he was incarcerated, Sykes began to take vigilantism seriously, battling crime and attempting to apprehend evildoers.

This character is not just strange, but his other personas are unaware that The Badger exists in the same vessel. And his other personas are hilarious. Emily is a nine-year-old kid, Pierre is a murderous Frenchman, Leroy is a dog, Gastineau Grover Depaul is an inner-city African American, and Max Swell is a playboy architect.

What the heck?